It’s that time of the year when companies are throwing a Christmas party for their employees. You would think they all go smooth and stay quite professional. Let me stop you here… Nope!
Some went just wild and sometimes a bit too far!
Here’s a selection of the Best Office Christmas Party Stories found on Reddit. But before, let’s start with a classic office party, from the movie ‘The Wolf of Wall Street’.
‘Two days before my first work Christmas party, a memo came out saying if you were arrested, the company would not bail you out of jail. A year before, several people were arrested for doing coke outside the Christmas party. The CEO had to bail them all out of jail. ‘
‘Last year, the Christmas party was on the one kid’s 19th birthday. As he was now legal, our coworkers proceeded to get the poor kid absolutely hammered, three or four of them in particular, who bought most of the drinks for him. The restaurant we were at has a special of 6 different colored shots nicknamed the Rainbow. They bought him three sets, on top of beers and other shots. This guy was so far gone at the end of the night that I had to hold the straw still so he could drink water. I’m not sure if his girlfriend was more angry with him or amused by him.
The boss sent a message to our group chat later that night, saying that the guy’s dad had called our boss and wanted to know who had bought all the drinks for him. My boss waited a few hours to tell everyone he was joking. I’ve never seen my coworkers freak out like that before. It was priceless.’
‘A place that I worked at about 8 years ago had a huge party. One of the managers brought brownies and the director of operations(let’s call him Jack) was the first to try them as we were setting up the food table. About half an hour later, as we were finishing up, Jack starts giggling and talking about how tall he feels. The guy that brought the brownies grabbed the wrong plate as he left the house and accidentally brought pot brownies. Needless to say, me gathered as many ofthe stoners as we could to clear that plate before anyone else got to them and tried to keep Jack away from other management.’
‘My friend is in charge of a number of temporary hires, contract workers, and freelancers at an ad agency. Her company’s HR department sent a mass save-the-date email for the holiday party to everyone, including the people she has under her. That was a mistake. She now has to contact each one and tell them they are not invited to the company party.’
‘It was the first holiday party my office had hosted in many years. Naturally many employees were eager to take advantage and enjoy the well-earned libations. I was tentative at first, but joined the fray once I saw that upper management was fully committed to the good time, i.e. getting completely hammered.
I quickly caught up to the pack, thoroughly enjoying myself and telling many stories, as I am want to do. Unfortunately, I got a little too caught up in the moment and, at the climax of a particular story, swung my arms in the air for emphasis.
As I did, my hand hit the bottom of a beer bottle just as my colleague put it to her lips, causing her to hit herself with it. After the initial shock had worn off and she cleaned up the spilled beer on her clothes, she turned to tell me she was OK, and if I wasn’t feeling bad enough, my guilt skyrocketed: As she spoke I noticed that her front tooth had broken as a result of the bottle hitting her face. It wasn’t completely knocked out, but it was chipped well enough to be unmistakable.
I felt completely horrible and informed her of what happened, and she ran to the bathroom to confirm. To her credit, she was slightly embarrassed when she returned but stayed at the party and went out of her way to tell me that it was no big deal. Regardless, I still felt like a jerk the rest of the night.
A few days later she went to the dentist and had the tooth fixed, and it was a relief that no permanent damage had occurred. But I won’t be telling any more stories at holiday parties for a while.’
‘My boss made out with a mop.’
‘Let me preface this by saying that my team and I love hot sauces – the hotter and more exotic the better. We collect them and share them around when we find a good one.
My team went out to a fancy Italian restaurant in the Denver area a few Christmases ago, and one of the guys had gone to a specialty spice store downtown and bought some whole Ghost Chili peppers to use in some chili. He saved one and produced it that night at dinner; daring anyone to eat it.
Being more on the machismo side of things, one of the other guys accepted the challenge and chomped it down whole. After turning redder than Rudolph’s nose, and having mild hallucinations, he ended up vomiting all over the floor of one of the side server rooms of the restaurant.
Needless to say many laughs were had by all on behalf of his overestimated pain tolerance, and his Christmas dinner was thoroughly ruined because he said “things didn’t taste right” for several days afterwards.’
‘I worked as a maintenance facilities man for a large school and foster home for troubled children. I showed up at the work Christmas party that was hosted by the programs nurse. Social anxiety troubled me a lot back then, so before I even knocked on the door I’d drank eight nips of vodka.
Within twenty minutes of being there I fell down a full flight of stairs and crashed through their screen door. This happened in front of about twenty coworkers including the program’s administration and my immediate supervisors.
After apologizing and slurring profusely I told everybody that my ride was out front to pick me up. I hid in the bushes down the street until my significant other picked me up two hours later.’
‘At last year’s office party, this 22-year-old kid got drunk and basically cursed me out in front of everyone. He then threw a punch at me.
I simply stepped aside and watched him fall over. He ended up breaking his arm, lost a tooth, and lost a job. Police came, but no charges were filed as he didn’t make any sort of contact.’
‘I was leaving the office where I worked, a government department, so the end of year party was also a de facto farewell party for me. As far as stuffy office parties where the entire drinks menu is funded by taxpayers, it was pretty damn swinging.
Anyway, about an hour into it a girl I had been talking to all year comes up and asks if I want to get out of there. Hell yes I do. She says we should go get coffee and then there is something she wants to show me because it might be the last time I ever see her. I say my final goodbyes to my boss and workers, all lovely people, and duck out of the party before it winds down to go get coffee with this woman who I’d been hitting it off really well with, or so I thought.
We get to a cafe, order drinks, chat for a bit and the second the waiter walks away, this crazy bitch drags out all of these charts and forms and shit, even had a little A-stand for her presentation, asking me to sign up for Amway.
I drank my scaldingly hot coffee way too quick and noped the hell out of there to run back to my party, but it was too late, and the only person there was the janitor. His apathetic continuation of floor waxing seemed to both sum up and punctuate the entire night.’
‘Once my boss challenged me to a shot contest at the start of the night. I blacked out shortly thereafter, but when I came in to work the next day, I had received the new nickname of ‘Steak Pants.” I never asked what I did to get this nickname, and I really don’t want to know.’
‘After rolling into the office the morning following my company holiday party, I received the company-wide email blast providing a link to the photo booth gallery.
After scrolling through several hours of tame photos, I discovered a series of 25 pictures showing my boss in a progressing state of undress while hooking up with a colleague from a different department.
The gallery was removed from public access within the hour, and both photo subjects were sent to HR.’
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